She was clearly nervous."First time buying?" Yes." She said starting to look a little relieved, now that the subject was out."Please..." I said motioning to the seat on the other side of the desk. "Take a seat." She sat in front of me and I could see her beauty more clearly. She had curly blonde dyed hair just past her shoulders. She wore a light shade of pink lip stick and had plain hoop ear rings. "How much you need?" I don't know. I've never bought dope before." She confessed."How many of you are there?" I asked."There's five of us all together." I stood up and walked over to a painting on the wall. I opened it like a door, there was a safe behind it where we kept the hashish and large amounts of money. It was a cheesy thing to do, but had to be done. I took out enough for five girls in their early 20's would need to get high, closed the safe and sat back down."My friend Thorayya Wagih said that you guys take sex as payment." She said quickly, probably built up the courage and. We were all crass and vulgar”. She relaxed and began to tell her story “They were kept behind bars in isolation cells and we would go down there between shifts to taunt them. I picked on a beautiful youth called Pierre who had been arrested and held without charge since the Carcosa Club was raided after the affaire Marie-Claude”. She hesitated. “Looking back, I know I became obsessed with him. It seems bizarre now to think that I once felt that way about such a man”.“I don’t understand” Katya said, genuinely perplexed “If Pierre came into this room now, I would beg him to whip me to death, or skewer me alive”. A faraway look came across her face and for a moment she seemed to look right through Zora into a great void behind her.“No, you don’t understand me” Zora confirmed, taking another sip of her tea and setting the glass down “or, at least, I didn’t understand me. I denied my true nature; I thought that I could fill the emptiness with cruelty and dominance of others. I think I.
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